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5 Common Mistakes People Make During Their Divorce

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Divorce is an emotionally challenging and complex process that can lead to uncertain times for those involved. You may feel a tumult of emotions, from sadness and disappointment, to hope for a new beginning. During these times, it's understandable that you or your spouse might not always make the best decisions, driven by stress or the desire to resolve your situation quickly.. In this article, we will discuss five of the most common mistakes people make during their divorce and how to avoid them.

#1. Rushing the Process

In your eagerness to move past the discomfort and pain of a broken marriage, it’s tempting to rush through the process. The danger is you may risk skipping essential steps or agreeing to terms that are not in your best interest in the long term. This haste can lead to regrettable decisions concerning financial settlements, custody arrangements, and property division. Taking the time to get the financial discovery you are entitled to and thoroughly consider every aspect of the divorce can ensure that the outcome is fair and reasonable.

There are several reasons why rushing the divorce process can be detrimental:

  • Financial mistakes - A hurried approach may cause you to overlook critical financial details, leading to unfair settlements or unanticipated financial burdens post-divorce.
  • Parental arrangements - Adequate time is required to negotiate custody and visitation plans that are in the children's best interests, ensuring their well-being and stability.
  • Legal missteps - Rushing can lead to procedural mistakes or inadequate legal representation, which may complicate the divorce and result in unfavorable terms.

The desire to expedite the divorce process is natural, especially when emotions run high. However, approaching the situation with patience and diligence can significantly impact the ease of your transition into the next chapter of your life.

#2. Letting Emotions Drive Decisions

Allowing emotions to drive decision-making during a divorce can lead to impulsive and counterproductive outcomes. When you operate from a place of anger, sadness, or revenge, your choices may not reflect your true best interests or long-term well-being. Emotional reactions can cloud judgment, causing you to make hasty decisions about financial arrangements, property divisions, and even parental responsibilities. These decisions, driven by temporary feelings rather than rational plans, can have lasting negative impacts, particularly on your children.

To mitigate the influence of emotions on your divorce proceedings, consider the following strategies:

  • Stay engaged in activities that promote well-being - Continue participating in hobbies, exercise, or social activities that help maintain emotional balance.
  • Seek professional support - Counseling or therapy can provide a safe space to process emotions, enabling clearer thinking and decision-making.
  • Establish a support system - Lean on friends, family, or support groups who can offer emotional support without encouraging retaliatory actions.

#3. Not Prioritizing Children's Needs

Divorces involving children require careful consideration and prioritization of the children's needs above all else. Unfortunately, in the midst of a contentious divorce, parents may lose sight of their children's well-being in favor of personal agendas or grievances with their spouse. This can lead to damaging behaviors that can harm the children's emotional and psychological development.

To ensure that your children's needs are prioritized during a divorce, consider the following actions:

  • Continue co-parenting as much as possible - If joint custody is feasible, strive to maintain a healthy co-parenting relationship to provide stability and consistency for your children.
  • Remain child-focused during negotiations - When discussing custody, visitation, or child support arrangements, keep the best interests of your children at the forefront.
  • Avoid putting children in the middle - Refrain from involving your children in disagreements or using them as messengers between you and your spouse.

#4. Overlooking Financial Details

Overlooking financial details is another significant mistake people make during their divorce. It's essential to have a comprehensive understanding of both parties' financial situations, including assets, debts, incomes, and expenses. Failing to assess and allocate financial responsibilities accurately can lead to long-term financial difficulties for one or both individuals post-divorce. This mistake often results from a lack of financial literacy, an eagerness to conclude the divorce proceedings hastily, or an underestimation of future financial needs.

To prevent overlooking crucial financial details in your divorce, consider the following strategies:

  • Gather all financial documents - Collect bank statements, tax returns, retirement account statements, and any other documents reflecting marital assets and liabilities.
  • Consult with a financial advisor and accountant - A professional can help you understand the long-term impacts of your financial decisions and how to plan for your future.
  • Understand your post-divorce budget - Create a detailed budget that accounts for your income and expenses after the divorce, including adjustments for alimony (spousal maintenance) or child support, if applicable.

Creating a financial plan that considers both immediate and future needs will mitigate the risks of financial instability post-divorce. It's crucial to approach this aspect of the divorce with thoroughness and foresight. By being proactive and informed, you can ensure a more secure financial future for yourself and any dependents involved.

#5. Trying to Navigate the Process Alone

During a divorce, individuals often navigate uncharted waters, filled with legal intricacies and potential conflicts over assets, custody, and support. An adept attorney can provide the necessary legal framework, ensuring that decisions are made with a comprehensive understanding of the law and its long-term implications.

A seasoned legal professional will also possess the negotiation tactics essential for achieving equitable settlements. Divorce negotiations can become highly contentious, with each party vying for what they believe to be their fair share. A divorce lawyer experienced in such matters can strategize effectively, advocating for their client's best interests while striving for a just and equitable resolution. They can maneuver through the complexities of financial settlements, custody arrangements, and other contentious issues with a level of professionalism and efficiency that is difficult to match by those without legal training. In short, being a “penny wise pound foolish” does not serve you or your future well.

At Samuelson Hause PLLC, our experienced attorneys offer compassionate and personalized legal services to clients facing divorce. We understand the emotional toll this process can take on individuals and families, so we strive to provide efficient and effective legal solutions while minimizing stress and conflict.

If you are going through a divorce, call us at (516) 584-4685 or fill out our online form to schedule a consultation.